Lifestyle

DEAR 2018,

You’ve got some big shoes to fill. 

2017 was quite a year. And as I sit and reflect on the last 12 months, I can’t help but think what a few years I’ve had. But why do I still feel as if I haven’t done enough? Feel as if I’m not successful enough and I don’t do enough with my time. 

Do you ever feel like that? In all honesty, most people do. But why? And what are we using as our reference? The people we see on Instagram? Or maybe the coworker who always seems to have their life in order? And sometimes it’s just your own self-criticism. We focus on what we haven’t done, what we should, or what we think we should do.

Why do we do that to ourselves? No, seriously! It can’t just be social media, right? Is it programmed in our brains to be negative or more critical of ourselves than anyone else? Or have we been taught somewhere down the line that we need to do as much as we possibly can? I don’t have the answers, I’m not sure why, but I know it isn’t healthy. And I’m positive that it doesn’t make us happy. Right now is a time of setting resolutions, goals, doing as much as we can around the holidays, being torn in so many different directions, I mean, come on! 

Someone once told me that moving and job changes are some of the largest life changes that people go through, and some of the hardest to handle. So when I feel like I don’t do enough, and I talk to family or friends about it, they are the ones who have to remind me that I have moved four times in the past few years. They are the ones who have to remind me that life changes aren’t easy, and to give myself a break. Why couldn’t I figure that out on my own? Why was it that I have to hear it from other people before realizing it myself? 

I read an article once on how to deal with major life changes and things that you should remember when trying to process it all. But I realized after I read the article (cough cough maybe a dozen times) that it isn’t just life changes that these tips apply to, but really every day endeavors and guilt. See for yourself: The first tip was that it is okay to be emotional, which was the hardest for me to come to terms with. Not just because I used to never cry… like, ever, but because I don’t like to appear vulnerable, or appear like I can’t handle something on my own. Oddly enough the next tip was that it’s okay to be vulnerable. I probably should have read that one first. 

The other two tips that I walked away with are the two that I remind myself of on a daily basis. The first is that you can adapt to anything, and the second is that you have to ask for help. The second is also hard for me. My parents like to call it my ‘independence’, which really is just a parent’s euphemism for “hard-headed”. They think i can’t translate their lingo. 

How many times in a week do you feel like there should be three of you? How many times a week do you feel like you just won’t be able to get through it all? Enter tips three and four.  

I have my ups and downs. Days where I run all of my errands, clean every corner of the house, have an amazing work out, and the creativity is flowing. Then I’ll wake up the next day and barely have it in me to wash the dishes or work out at all. I’ve struggled with this my entire adulthood, and it can make lofty goals seem even less possible to attain. Has it gotten better as I’ve gotten older? A bit, but it is still a constant struggle. So if I HAD to name a resolution? Just go! Get up, handle your (stuff) πŸ™‚ and go. Like the article said, you are more adaptable and capable than you think you are. 

Maybe 2018 we’ll all finally realize how capable we really are.